As a sexuality educator, I am well aware that there are a bevy of things one can stick up ones ass. Lucky for us, more and more sex toy (or adult toy) manufacturers are producing a mind boggling amount of toys intended just for anal play.
Just a quick reminder; never, ever, ever place items up your bum that are not intended for anal play. This could be anything from jars and cans--which happen to be the number 1 of all ER "foreign object" rectal removals, lollipops, vibrating bullets, or any number of awesome sex toys that do not have a base or flange. If you are not sure what I'm talking about, go here for some examples of what NOT to place up your arse.
Because the rectum is controlled by 2 different sphincters, it is vital that toys used when engaging in a little back door action have a base or flange.
But why, you ask?
Orgasms are powerful and wondrous things. Because orgasms are essentially a series of strong pelvic floor contractions, that means that most of us have little, if any, control over how strong and long those contractions are. While some contractions may push downward, others may push upward simultaneously.
Here is a picture of a sex toy that is specifically produced to be a butt plug. It's sleek, and looks pretty aerodynamic to me. The only thing keeping it from potentially acting as a mini rocket into your colon is that beautiful base. Remember my favorite saying--"the anus is a hungry, hungry orifice!"
So why on earth do people even want to experiment with butt plugs?
Firstly, they are a doorway (pun intended) to many different sensations. Many people, regardless of their sexual identity, find anally focused sensations to be highly desirable as the anus and rectum are filled with sensitive nerve endings. Secondly, many people really enjoy the fullness they feel when using a proper butt plug. Not everyone is going to enjoy the same amount of fullness. For example, some people may find that they are most comfortable using a smaller sized plug that they purchased as a bit of a "starter" toy. Some will enjoy plugs that are graduated and are much wider at the base than they are at the top--think of these toys a little like your fingers. The butt plug will be widest at the base and get increasingly smaller at each ridge or knuckle (also called flanges, by the way).
I adore this scene from the "Inbetweeners". So, I guess that makes me about 12 years old.
The main thing that separates butt plugs from all other sex toys is that they are widest at the base, tend to be super smooth, and gradually become thinner at the top. Toys that have a prominent curve to them are intended for prostate play, but that is really a whole other blog post.
There is absolutely no reason to feel ashamed, embarrassed, or "dirty" when shopping for butt plugs. The general rule is to start smaller and then gradually--over time--work your way up towards larger sizes that give you a fuller sensation. Like I mentioned before, there are also many butt plugs that are graduated by definite ridges. In this case, most people can expect to begin and only be able to enjoy the smallest portion at the top. As you become more comfortable with it, you can increase the size by inserting more of the toy.
Besides using ONLY sex toys that have a base or a flange, you will also need to use lots and lots of lube. The rectum is essentially a tube like structure that is intended to absorb water and let solid waste pass through. The tissue is incredibly sensitive and prone to small tears. A good, made for anal play lubricant is key. Water based lube can be tricky when using them in the rectum because they will become absorbed into the body. The result is adding more lube or some water. Many people swear by silicone based lubes when doing anything anal. The molecules that make up silicone are larger than the mucous membranes. This means that the silicone acts as a really nice buffer between the toy and the rectum. A little goes a long way! Recently, I have gotten really into hybrid lubricants. They are the best of both worlds--water based and silicone based lube that is magically mixed together.
Not all butt plugs are the same. There are a lot of big company names who make oodles of different sized butt plugs, but they are made of non body friendly materials. They are cheaper to make, feel a bit tacky to the touch, and often have a strong plastic smell. Avoid these! I only see it as you throwing money away as they are notoriously difficult to properly sanitize.
Instead, look for materials that are non-porous and easy to clean. This includes medical grade silicone, metal, glass, and even wood. I know that you might be scratching your head thinking that is a recipe for one splintered ass, but I assure you it is not. The wood sex toys I am talking about have been carefully molded, sanded, and layered with a clear coating. Incidentally, they are also eco friendly.
So, now that we've covered all the basics, here are my personal choices for best butt plugs
Made of solid steel that provides both fullness and comfort. Yes, I mentioned that butt plugs that are curved are meant for prostate play and really require a whole other blog post, but I'm sticking this in (get it?) anyway.
Medical grade silicone that are universally adored by sex educators around the globe. They come in a variety of colors and sizes. TMI: The fun toy on the left is super fun to insert into the rectum of a vagina owner while simultaneously engaging in "doggie style" penetration.
Eco friendly toys that are referred to as "wood sculptures". Again, the curve means it is intended for prostate play, but I like the look and feel of them, so I'm including them in my list. Deal with it people.
Beautiful creations that are made out of nearly indestructible pyrex.
So, just to quickly recap; engaging/liking/loving/craving having something safe and specifically designed to be inserted into your rectum does not make you weird. It also doesn't mean you are gay--in case you are wondering that. Basically butt plugs = fun!